They think they know everything about me
they think they know my secrets
but what they dont know
could fill many leaflets
that my life has fallen
so many times
yet here I still stand
seeming all fine
that my heart has been broken
and sewn back together
but even then
its weaker than a feather
let them think
that they know all
but eventually, after knowing me
they’ll be appalled

Ok, I havn’t said anything in… God, I don’t know, and I’m too lazy to find out, because then I’ll feel even MORE bad… Okay, gramatically incorrect, but whatever. I am on spring break, so I will be on this computer for the better part of a week (maybe not straight, but close enough). I never do this, but I will now. If you have MSN messenger, go here . it is a site that has a bunch of bots, add-ons, and patches and it ROCKS. If you have any questions about it, then you can use the FAQ page on there, or ask me on MSN messenger with this S/N:

laurie61592@hotmail.com

So have fun with that :D Um, what else… Oh, yea just got over the flu, so that was fun ,and next week we have a talent show. These two are related because I am singing, and with the build-up of mucus in my throat, I sound like crap, so please, wish me luck >.< . Also nex week, I am going to New York City with a bunch of my classmates. I am going to bring about... Ten to twelve disposable cameras :D So that will be fun. Thats all my brain wants to spit out right now, so Happy Late Easter and all that good stuff ;)

Hilo again! (ok, I warn you, I’m HYPER :D) So, I would like to update cuz I havnt said much for awhile *sweat*. I have the new laptop (YAY) and it is an HP Pavilion zv6000 (whatever that means) and its really cool and stuff. I would tell you the gigs and hertz but I have no clue what that all is, and no clue what it means, so I won’t. I had my first Track Meet today, which I couldn’t run in. I missed too many days (its not my fault!! I didn’t have the physical in and I didnt even have a doctor!!)so I went for the whole “school spirit” thing. Though my “school spirit” ran a little low when it started to rain and it was FREEZING out there. One of my friends’ moms took me to the meet from school and took me back home (turns out that they were good friends to the people who lived here before). We left kinda early because it would’ve lasted until 10 or 11:00, and I am NOT going to stay out in the freezing rain for that long, sorry. Lets see, what else…Oh! My pains aren’t as consistent as we thought, and I havn’t been getting them for awhile (Heh, I think I just jinxed myself…*facepalm*) so thats good news. I did good at the All-County concert! I got a plaque and everything (when my mom gets the new scaner hooked up, I’ll put a picture of it on here). And the highschool we went to was H-U-G-E. A couple friends and I were going to the bathroom, and we got lost >.< This was all the day when we had the all-day rehersal before the night of the concert (two seperate days. Confusing, yes, but my head is a little in the clouds @.@). And I think that may finally be it. G’night all!!

Me: My keyboard is being stupid!!

Daszoeb:Haha, BabyRayne’s gay cuz her keyboard is.

Domovoi: *laughs* Not GAY…

Me: Yeah, not GAY, per se, but close!

Daszoeb: Wait, what?? Your bi?

Me: Yep *big smile*

Daszoeb: AWSOME!!

Domovoi: *busts a gut laughing*

Yes, actually. I AM Bisexual…Been kinda quiet about it for a LONG time, but hey, if people dont like me for who I am, tough. I’d rather be hated for who I am, then loved for who I am not. (Thanks, Hel for letting me steal that quote!! ;))

This is a song I printed from online. As I said before, I play the flute, and I decided to record this. It’s Greensleeves, and apparantly they don’t know who wrote it. They THINK it was King Henry VIII, so we have no clue :P

So here it is, me playing it. Enjoy!!

Greensleeves

Ok, I didnt post this before, I spaced it, but this is a small convorsation between band director (Mr. Cale), myself, and a tenor sax player at our first rehersal.

Mr. Cale: (joking to tenor sax player) Be quiet, nobody likes you!

Me:Yeah, the feelings mutual

Mr. Cale: Hey! (points director stick thingy at me) I dont know you!

ROFL. I guess you have to be me to think that was funny :P

This one happened tonight with two bass clarinets. We’ll call them Clarinet 1 and Clarinet 2.

Clarinet 1: Mr. Cale!

Mr. Cale: (fake annoyance) What?!

Clarinet 1: She needs to pee! (points to Clarinet 2)

Clarinet 2: I do not! I need a reed!

Again: ROFL. And nowÂ? ‘I need to pee’ is code for ‘I need a reed’ *facepalm* :P

Ok, so much fo Almost Daily Rant. More like about yearly. Today my rant is going to be about religion.

So there are some of you out there who are thinking “Your 13. What the heck can you possibly know about religion other than what your parents tell you?” Well, I am a very perceptive 13-year-old, and I know a lot more than people think. I am not Athiest, because I do not have every denial against god exsisting. The closest thing I am is Pagan. A lot of people think Pagans belive in devil worship, or the first things that come to their minds are Wiccans, but neither of there are true. The definition of Pagan is someone without religion. I have no defined religion, not at all. I belive there is a higher power, but it isnt God. It isn’t a one person or being. It’s…Something people would think to be a figmint of their imagination, but it’s there. Does that make any sense at all? Like saying it’s not there, but is. I guess you could say its everything. Like in the movie The Craft, they talk about Manon. Thats about as good as I can do to explain it. And I do belive in an afterlife, just not Heaven and Hell. I belive that the afterlife is just a place where our souls go after we die to create a new life. Talking to my mom about this last night, I think I have a better way of explaining it. Our sole purpose in life is to live through experiences. And when we die, our souls choose a new life to find more experiences, different ones. Another term ,less long-winded, is reincarnation.

Why do I get chosen for these pains? I got them again last night about one in the morning. Why can’t they just poof away? Even after the pains were gone, I cried. I just want them gone, no matter what the cost. It’s a good thing my mommy was willing to stay in the living room with me and comfort me. I’m staying home today so I can sleep, seeing as I got about five, four and a half hours of sleep. I hate pain. Its bad enough when I get sore from track, and then these stack up on it. Our only dot we can maybe connect is that last night, Wednesday, I had the pains. The time before it was another Wednesday. One week apart, so this may be a little piece. Well, We’ll see next week, won’t we?

Ok, I havn’t posted in awhile so here are some updates: I went to the doctor to a) get a physical and b) try to figure out what this chest pain is. When I got home on wednesday, we were going to go directly to the doctors office for a physical so I could run track. Anyway, when I got home, my chest started to hurt. I went into the kitchen to get water, but it got so bad, I ended up sitting on the floor crying. MonkeyBoy went and got my mom, and she helped me out to our truck. I couldn’t buckle my seatbelt it hurt so much. It was a fairly short drive, but it felt like hours to me. We got the the doctors and I stated to feel a bit better, but it wasnt completley gone. After signing papers, my mom and I went into the waiting room where I started to hurt again. The doctor came out and called my name, and we went in. The pain went away, to my great relief. So we got through the physical, and the doctor said that they’ll take blood to see if there was any ulcer bacteria (nope) and that they’ll take chest x-rays (nothin). So when my mom gets this unicare thingy, we’ll be going to some specialist in Morgantown. Doesn’t that sound fun? I guess I can’t say much considering I chose that. I would go through anything to get rid of this pain bacause it hurts (heh, ever heard that? pain hurts…D’oh!).

Now, to the point of the title, I am addicted to an online game called Flash Flash Revolution. Its essentially Dance Dance Revolution except you use the arrow pad. I got to play multiplayer, which is difficult due to vertical split-screen, but fun cuz I can kick all their butts :D. Since I have nothing else to do, my butt hurts and my legs hurt, I am now going to burn my eyes out with FFR :P

Domovoi: Whats this about two girls at a dance?

Me: Oh, yea. Someone caught two girls kissing in the bathrooms at school at the valentines dance.

Daszoeb: Lesbians? WHERE?!?

Me: MY school

Daszoeb: I LOVE lesbians, though!!

Me: you and the rest of the world…

Domovoi: Dude, the worst mistake you can make is hitting on a lesbian!

Me: Exactly! They wont date you, you could NEVER get them in bed.Heck, they’d probably CASTRATE you!!

Domovoi: *laughs his head off*

Daszoeb: *dreams are crushed* **

**I added this on there :P it was funny to type.

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